The Girl With Arthritis

Driving is probably the most common form of transportation. Most people learn when they're a teenager, and learning is a rite of passage for many young people. And though it's considered to be a very easy, common thing to do, a few don't agree one hundred per cent. Think about the physical act of driving. Your legs are stretched out in front of you and you have to keep control of the pressure you have on them to control the pedals. Your arms are stretched out in front of you to steer. And let's not forget turning your head to look around. And if you're backing up, let's not forget the painful twisting and turning there! It can be really intense and take a lot out of you! Driving for some is really painful. Some will say you're very lazy if you don't want to drive, or if you never were able to learn. I beg to differ. It's very hard to force yourself to do something that causes pain. It can also make you feel very unsafe: we know pain can be extrem...

Arthritis joint pain is one thing. I've lived with it long enough to know how to cope with it. I have found also easier to 'read' that pain: I can easier find what's increasing the pain and how I can help it. However, there is one joint that I find impossible to 'read,' and I have the worst time trying to find what's going to help it the most. My jaw. Most people will develop a click or pain in their jaw- or TMJ- at some point of their life. A lot of time, the jaw will heal itself with time and a little help. However, it's not that easy for others. There still isn't a lot of research about TMJ disorder and such, so the ways we treat it often have little scientific evidence to support it. Usually, prescribed treatment is a soft food diet, jaw excersises and stretches, splints, avoiding large jaw movements and overuse, and heat and cold therapy for six weeks. Many doctors are reluctant to go past this because it can be reversed. However, what's...

Oh the dreaded 'W' position. A way of sitting that has scared parents, doctors and teachers for generations. Children have found it comfortable whilst the adults around them shift and squirm. What's so big about sitting W? From what  I understand, sitting W puts stress on the knees, ankles and hips and is typically easier for some children because it requires less trunk strength. It also provides more area to spread weight, making it easier for children with less body strength to sit up. At the same time, it forces the hips to swing out in an unnatural position. There have been cases of hip dislocation and other injury resulting from it, in fact I even had a cousin who's knee popped out after sitting in the W position all day at school. I was a W sitter. I figured out how comfortable it was when I was about two or three years old. I only stopped when I was about ten years old after a doctor yelled at me to stop. It was the most comfortable for me. I didn't have ...

I had a cold the past week and I'm ninety nine per cent sure it has settled in my neck. Currently I cannot turn my head, look up, tilt my head or move. It's extremely painful and I can feel the tension in my neck. It's been this way for about three and a half days now. Not exactly a good time right now.  I had called the hospital yesterday asking to speak with one of the rheumatologists but they never got back to me and the doctor I saw Thursday about my neck (and cold symptoms) gave me antibiotics in case I had a virus and told me my neck should get better- that I probably slept wrong.  Yesterday I spent the day in pyjamas and relaxing. When I woke up today in the wee hours of the night in pain, I decided I would relax again today. But after a few hours, I decided enough was enough. I got dressed, did some washing up and I'm getting work done. I had the day to myself anyway, so it's not as if I'm actually missing out on something. If my neck isn't going t...

I am a procrastinator. If procrastination was an Olympic sport, I would get bronze, silver and gold every year running. I leave a lot of assignments to the week before they're due, and sometimes closer to their due date. You see, I procrastinate for a lot of reasons. The biggest reasons is arthritis, especially when it comes to art projects. And this is my Procrastination Reason List: 1.) I have an 'art studio' in my own house, however since it's on a different level, I have a hard time getting there sometimes. 2.) There are times when I really can't focus because of how uncomfortable I feel. 3.) Arthritis fatigue. Enough said. 4.) I will not preform well with stiff joints: Whatever I may be working on will most likely come out 'all wrong' and cause more frustration in the mean time. And, naturally, there are times I wait until the last moment to do a project just because I don't want to do it. But, mostly it's my arthritis reasons. And ...

I'm just having a bad day today. I just really don't like how I feel when I move: Everything is sore and stiff and uncomfortable. I'm extremely frustrated right now. All that frustration comes from feeling awkward about the way I move, being uncomfortable from the pain, being upset that I can't do much to help the pain and that people just don't get that I don't feel good, and from being held back from doing what I really want to get done. I'll probably just relax for a bit now and see if tomorrow is better: I had a few things I wanted to do that I'm really just not up for at the moment. The truth is, arthritis isn't just a chronic and painful illness. It's an uncomfortable, frustrating, awkward disease. Sorry, I just needed to express the emotional symptoms.

Today is a miserable arthritis day. I've been sore since I've woken up. I'm not feeling well at all as I am actually sick, but Arthur isn't helping what so ever. Even the joints that aren't affected by arthritis are aching and stiff (Shoulders, elbows, wrist, hands). But that's alright since I didn't have much of anything planned for today anyway. I feel like this picture today to tell you the truth. This picture I did a few years ago when I was in a lot of pain and stuck at a relatives house. It's not the best, in fact it was probably done in a few minutes but it made me feel better to put it down on paper. This was done in oil pastels, which did ease the odd pain I had in my hands because it's soft and it warmed as I drew, which soothed my muscles.

Sometimes on television I find ads for miracle joint looseners or bone strengtheners or something to keep your muscles strong. They're meant for people older than fifty and they show fifty, sixty and seventy year olds do gymnastics, climbing mountains or carrying hundred pound sacks of flour on each shoulder. I can't do anything like that. I get angry (not jealous, angry) that these people who are older and have had so much experience be strong as a bull, versus my friends and I with arthritis who have no experience and are very weak, even with physical therapy and medications. Most of them have had arthritis since they were toddlers or young children: The oldest age to discover their pain was -I think- ten or so years. But you would think we were envious at that. We really aren't. Or that I know of. Perhaps we all do but we just don't admit it. If anyone really wants  to do something, they do it. No one goes and runs and puts themself in pain for nothing: Granted, ...

This past month I've been going to non-stop parties and functions. Not out of wanting to go really, but of having to attend out of politeness, necessity or because I'm being dragged by my parents. I'm so exhausted and sore: These old bones can't take much more. I really can't handle going out. They aren't even over the top parties: We have supper, talk a little and maybe have coffee and dessert. Even a trip to the cinema after class took a lot out of me. Maybe it was the trip to the cinema (which is not often due to the fact it is several towns over), or maybe it was a long day of school and an hour of swimming. The point is, even going out often and doing practically nothing is tiring. Though I know I could be way worse, it is very true when they say kids with arthritis are kids in the bodies of the elderly. Even then, I've seen many elderly people who are healthier and stronger.

I never understood how severe my arthritis really is. I didn't see how stiff I walk until watching a video of me walking. I didn't bend my knees too often. I asked my friend if I 'walked like a robot' all the time, and he nodded, not thinking much of it. I didn't listen to the pops and cracks of my joints until my friend with arthritis walked beside me, and we seemed to mirror to sounds. I couldn't hear them until someone asked if we were okay. I didn't realise how sore I always am until right now, sitting in my favourite position with my feet propped up on the most comfortable chair I have. I didn't pay attention but now that I think of it, I'm always like this: I got used to relaxing in pain. It's like resting after a procedure when your comfortable but still bothered by pain. As I have said it once, I will say it again, I know my life could be so much worse. But this is me just coming to learn reality explain all of this.